Personal Recount

I was eagerly waiting for my eighth birthday but just the month before it came, my mother told me we were not celebrating it. I was extremely disappointed and sad but told her it was okay.
On my birthday though, my mother sent me to my friend’s house in the afternoon in my best dress. I was too young to be confused. At my friend’s house, I was told that her family was going to somebody else’s house for her birthday party and that she shared the same birthday as me. I had never heard of her that girl before, so I assumed that she was somebody they knew and I did not. ( I was a stupid kid) They had packed the girl’s birthday gift in fancy paper and were refusing to tell me what was inside. Again, I was too ignorant to insist on asking what was inside. I was envious of her that she got to celebrate her birthday and I did not. However, I wanted to be a good sport and not a whiny kid, so I went along with them.
They drove me to a place very near to my house and parked just outside the block beside mine. We walked to my block and entered the lift. I was very unaware of my surroundings and did not bother to ask why we were going to my house. I readily agreed to open the door of my own house and when I did, the house was pitch black.
Suddenly, when I was about to question my friend’s parents on why they had brought me home when there was no one there, the lights were switched on and all of my friends shouted, “Surprise! Happy birthday!” My jaw dropped and remained there for at least thirty seconds. I looked around my house and saw that it was decorated with balloons and streamers. There was a magician standing in the middle of the living room with the sofas pushed to sides. Later, when I asked if they had been planning the party since the month before, they told me that the idea had suddenly sprung up that day.
That was my most memorable birthday party. I learnt that even birthday parties could be surprising sometimes...


Marks:
Focus: 4
Sentence & paragraphs: 3
Language & vocabulary: 4
Sentence fluency: 3
Spelling & grammar: 3
Total marks: 17/20